By Last Caress.

Mary (Deanna Russo) is a freelance writer. She’s just moved into the leafy suburbs of Somewhere, Anytown, USA. These suburbs are picture-perfect; there’s even a throwback ice cream truck tinkling along as though it drove right out of the 1950’s, the bow-tie-and-apron clad operator within (Emil Johnsen) offering a cheery/creepy wave to all and sundry as he passes by.

Mary has moved so recently that her husband is still across the country in Seattle for an additional week, waiting while their two kids finish up their school terms and concluding their affairs up in the state of Washington. Mary’s unpacking the boxes she brought with her and eagerly awaiting the removal truck which will deliver to her all of their furniture, although her joy at the truck’s arrival is tempered by the leering, almost rapey vibe emanating from the lone furniture removal guy. Still, eff him; Mary has more pressing concerns. She misses her family as one might expect, and she is also in thrall to the tyranny of the blank page, a cursor blinking impassively at her from the corner of an enormous white field on her laptop from whence she hopes a blog all about the challenges of upping sticks and hauling oneself across the country will spring, any second now. I know exactly how she feels.

Mary meets nosey next-door neighbour Jessica (Hilary Barraford), a Desperate Housewives type whose every breezy question is an implied judgment, every beam of acknowledgment a silent condemnation. Jessica takes it upon herself to introduce Mary to her similarly plastic friends Christina and Katie. Welcome to the neighbourhood! Cheshire cat grins up to eleven, everybody! Christina is throwing her son Max (John Redlinger) a high-school graduation party this evening and everybody is going to be there. Would Mary like to come along? To be honest she’d rather not but these WASPs aren’t going to stop buzzing until Mary relents. And anyway, what else is she going to do?

Well, the party is everything Mary hoped that it wouldn’t be, and kinda knew that it would be. She’s plied with vodka, propositioned by a greasy, ponytailed mid-life crisis, and manages to both offend and be offended by Jessica who, upon suggesting Mary have an affair while her husband is still not about, suddenly makes her excuses and skedaddles when Mary reassures her that she’s got a perfectly sturdy vibrator for that. In fact if Mary hadn’t met the affable Max and his girlfriend Tracy upon entering the shindig and succeeded in bumming a crafty toke from them, she wouldn’t have stuck it out for as long as she did. Still, it’s late now and Mary’s off to bed. But… can she still hear that ice cream truck tinkling along, somewhere out there, at this hour? What’s that all about?

The Ice Cream Truck, written, produced and directed by Megan Freels Johnston (whom the IMDb informs me is the granddaughter of renowned writer Elmore Leonard, author of Get Shorty, 3:10 to Yuma and Rum Punch – the source novel for Quentin Tarantino’s Jackie Brown – among many others), is fantastic at setting a disquieting and eerie tone, either via the economy of movement from the camera and everything it sees, or via the brilliantly retro (and on-trend) horror-synth score by Michael Boateng. In every frame, Ms. Johnston evokes an off-kilter, almost Burton-esque dream-state, implying something akin to Howard Greenhalgh’s surreal music video for Soundgarden’s Black Hole Sun. Everything about this too-perfect suburban idyll seems… wrong. Like, really wrong.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cakTOMEPr74

It’s slightly disappointing then to discover as The Ice Cream Truck progresses that, ultimately, there is in fact a little less going on here than first meets the eye, not more. Still, that shouldn’t detract anybody from seeking out The Ice Cream Truck for the beautifully shot, wonderfully atmospheric piece that it is, featuring a fantastic anchoring central performance by Deanna Russo, ably supported across the board but particularly by the likeable John Redlinger and Hilary Barraford, and which hints at possibilities of far more Lynchian terrors to come from this hugely promising writer/director. Recommended.

The Ice Cream Truck will be released on VOD on August 18th, 2017.

www.icecreamtruckmovie.com

“How much is a promise worth these days? An aspiring fashion designer finds out when she has to choose between fulfilling her promise and realising her dream.”

The Story of 90 Coins, directed by Michael Wong, is a traditional fairytale romance, set in the modern day. Handsome young man, Wang Yuyang (played by Han Dongjun) begins the story by proclaiming his desire to marry beautiful young woman, Chen Wen (Played by Zhuang Zhiqi). When her response amounts to “Thanks but no thanks” he embarks on an epic 90 day quest to win her affections. On each day he will present her with a coin wrapped in a handwritten note. If he wins, he will be entitled to her hand in marriage. If he loses, they will spend the money on farewell drinks, as friendship is not an option.

Wang Yuyang proves himself a magnificent warrior in the pursuit of love with sentimental gestures, such as requesting a song on the radio, and displays of physical strength, including giving an under-the-weather Chen Wen a piggyback. On the 90th day, she is away, spending time with her sick grandfather. Undeterred, our hero phones her and, gathering all of his courage, requests her answer.

Admirably, she sets aside any feelings of guilt, or reminders of her own mortality brought on by the visit to her ailing grandparent, to give him the positive answer that he is seeking.

However, all hopes for our “Happily Ever After” ending are dashed by the appearance of a handsome French coworker. He attempts to lure our young fashion designer heroine to Paris, in order to work in the fashion industry there.

The jealousy is too much for our hero to bear, so he pushes Chen Wen away in sorrow. All that is left is for this young woman to ruminate on her choices, leaving us with a cautionary message: A promise is an obligation – break an oath and you may live to regret it.

The Story of 90 Coins has been nominated for a huge number of awards. If you would like to know why, watch the film here:

Love him or hate him, there’s no denying that Christopher Nolan is among the most influential and masterful directors of our time. Every single film he has made has been visually stunning, boasting inspired performances and pitch-perfect directing. It’s easy to see why so many love the man and his work. But, it’s also easy to see why some people are less than impressed with him, especially of late. All of his films tend to carry the same tone, dramatic feel and, to an extent, eerily similar stories and characters. Also, while the man is near flawless as a director, his scripts tend to suffer – either being overbearing or overly sympathetic. Personally, I’ve found Nolan’s career to be a mixed bag. The Dark Knight and Memento are among the best I’ve ever seen. Meanwhile, The other two Batman films he directed felt hollow to me, and Interstellar, to me, was nearly insufferable. But that didn’t stop me from looking forward to Nolan’s war epic, Dunkirk.

The film follows the Dunkirk evacuation in World War II. The Allied Forces (the British and French at this time), were surrounded at the northern coast of France and had to be evacuated at, where else, Dunkirk.

From the first second, we are thrown right into the middle of all this. Remember Saving Private Ryan and the D-Day beach opening? Well, imagine that was the whole film – with less blood and guts that is. We follow three men. A young soldier on the land. Mark Rylance in his little fishing boat on the sea. Tom Hardy fighting German fighters in the air. From those three we get our film. A film that doesn’t focus on the big picture of Dunkirk, just pieces of it. As we as an audience see this evacuation through the experiences of these three men.

It’s become cliché to say it now, but it’s true. Dunkirk is visually amazing! It feels real. It’s raw, pulls no punches and immerses you in the here-and-now of the war at hand. I have never been at war, and needless to say I wasn’t at the Dunkirk evacuation. But I could imagine this to be pretty accurate as to how these men felt. Around 300 thousand men on a beach, while the Germans bombarded them from the air. It’s very bleak colour-wise, most consisting of greys, browns and dark blues. But the sets look real enough to touch them. At times, you swear you could even smell the ocean. More impressive is the sound. The guns make the actual sounds of guns, not the Hollywood popping we’re used to. The planes are deafening. The music by Hans Zimmer is some of the best the man has made in years. It incorporates the sounds of objects with its score – such as the ticking of a clock or the growling of an engine. It’s just ingenious.

The acting is top-notch, and from some surprising cast members too. Mark Rylance, Tom Hardy, Cillian Murphy and Kenneth Branagh are men we expect greatness from. But Harry Styles! God awful boy-band One Direction Harry Styles! Giving a great performance? Hard as it is to believe; but yes, he does exactly that. Most of the other actors in this film are not popular names, and I’d be lying if I Said that I knew who they were. But, given the chance, they have the talent to make themselves well-known household names.

Nolan directs the actors and the rest of the film exceptionally well. This is stressful to watch – and I mean that in a good way. It’s a film about the true event at Dunkirk.

If it’s not stressful, or at least tense, then something has gone wrong somewhere. It’s a very psychological film. So, even if the violence isn’t very graphic (at all really), you still feel every ounce of dead and fear these men are going through. Nolan also tells the story in a very unique way. For a moment I was confused by the film; in one scene it was night time, but then the following one it was day, but then it cut back to night in the next scene. It confused me until I realised that we were not receiving this story in chronological order. The beach takes place one weak from the ending. Rylance is one day from the ending. And Hardy is just one hour from it. It was a detail that I missed for a long time into the films hour-and-a-half runtime. Odd at first, but once I got used to it I realised that there was no other way to make this film.

Dunkirk may well be among my favourite films of the year so far, but it’s not perfect. There are some dialogue issues, particularly towards the end. I also don’t think the film has too much re-watch value. It’s essential viewing in my eyes, but it’s a bit too stressful and emotionally draining for a revisit anytime soon. But, while this didn’t bother me, I think what most people are going to take issue with is that we learn nothing about the characters in the film. Not a single thing. There’s no cliched “my wife is waiting at home, with our first baby who I’ll see soon because I’m two days from retirement” stuff. We don’t learn that this person was a teacher, or that one a store keeper. We don’t learn that one’s age. We don’t know if this man is a psychopath. We know nothing. But, neither did these men. Nobody knew anybody on this beach. This film sets itself out to capture the raw feeling of this war, and not knowing is a huge part of it. We may not know them, but they’re no less sympathetic for it. I have a feeling Nolan did this for the same reason he never shows us a German soldier (save a couple silhouettes in one scene). Because doing so would detract from the film at hand, and the horror in the moment.

Dunkirk is a film you need to see. If only once.

It’s among my favourite of Nolan’s films, and is by far his most original since Memento. Despite it’s hard-going nature, Dunkirk will also have you entertained come the end. In a year of many blockbuster disappointments, it’s refreshing to see a historical film (of all things) live up to its name and potential. Love Nolan or hate him, this is one that that should not be missed.

Having created quite an obsession in my mind with Neil Blomkamp after the release of District 9 which sits firmly amongst my favourite movies of all time, when I first heard of Oats Studio’s Volume One Series directed by Blomkamp then I’ll admit I was taken right away and I had to watch. Missing the opportunity to review the first release Rakka, a post-apocalyptic film starring Sigourney Weaver, I thought I’d start with the second of four short films in the series, Firebase.

Firebase is a mix of horror, sci-fi and gore, bringing together almost all aspects and techniques used in both these genres from found footage to physical horror and CGI. After surviving a massacre, Sgt. Hines is drawn to destroy an extra-terrestrial force as both American soldiers and the Viet Minh find themselves finding a new kind of enemy that neither of them were prepared for.

Blomkamp risks putting too much into the basket in Firebase, and I’m left unsure whether or not he succeeded. Firebase had me until its final moments and CGI is introduced with an alien sequence based in Russia. Following from a storyline based on an attack by a man known as ‘the river god’ who has the power to control people and make himself invisible it seemed odd and out of place, not helped by unconvincing effects. Nonetheless Firebase is well-paced and entertaining and is a thought provoking film with all the interest and commentary that Blomkamp brought to District 9.

Despite no standout stars following Weavers appearance in Rakka, the case of Firebase give a good account for themselves and the team that brought together the gory and horrific River God have created something both disturbing and beautiful.

It’s hard to judge Firebase alone without the final two films, but it is well worth a watch and has kept me interested to see the rest of what volume One has in store.

Firebase is available on YouTube now.

By Last Caress.

Edgar Friendly Jr. – aka Bonejangles – is a serial killer.

Over 100 kills. His father Edgar Sr. (a scene-licking cameo from Phantasm‘s Reggie Bannister) was a serial killer of some repute himself who went by the name of The New Brunswick Ripper, and his mother was a voodoo priestess. Over the years, Bonejangles has been shot, stabbed, burnt, drowned, doused in toxic waste and even frozen. But he keeps on popping back up like… well, a hideous supernatural slasher movie monster. And that’s the official police line on the guy!

What they DO know is that electricity seems to harm him (they all have a weakness somewhere, don’t they?) and, despite their assault being prefaced by the captain’s warning that “Most of you won’t be coming back tonight,” Bonejangles opens with the town’s entire small cadre of police officers – including the nerdy virgin stoner Randy (Jamie Scott Gordon) and his wiseacre partner Doug (Kelly Misek Jr.), both straight out of the Police Academy franchise, it seems – attempting to corner Bonejangles in a warehouse, armed with Tasers. Against the odds, they succeed in capturing Bojangles but at heavy cost to the police force, almost all of whom are killed; all but Doug, Randy and Lisa (Hannah Richter) in fact, leaving the station so depleted that they have to draft in another cop from elsewhere to help run the place and, for some reason I couldn’t quite fathom, this cop – officer Juan LaRhumba (Lawrence Wayne Curry) – is an enormously camp gay black stereotype from the early eighties. I think it was for comedy effect. Cos, you know, gays are funny, and black gays are hilarious. Yeah.

Anyway, their first objective for this bungling cop quartet is to move the monstrous Bonejangles to a sanitorium in the nearby city of Argento (yep: Argento).

Marrying up The Purge with Night of the Living Dead and even The Town that Dreaded Sundown, the city of Argento is buzzing. Everybody is stockpiling provisions and weapons.. Why? Well, it’s April 18th, and on the night of this date every year Argento – cursed long ago by a witch – plays host until sunrise to hordes of zombies eager to chomp on anyone who comes near. On top of this, town “hero” Clint (Devin Toft) and his belle Sally (Julia Cavanaugh) are about to marry. Bit of a strange night upon which to declare one’s nuptials but, hey-ho, I’m sure it’ll come to bear somewhere down the line. Soon, the cops’ transport van is crashed, they’re on the run through the town, Bonejangles is loose and, between him, the zombies, the witches and the local rednecks, will the cops stay alive? Will the town’s residents stay alive? Will Clint and Sally get hitched? Will any of you keep watching past the first twenty minutes?

Bonejangles, written by Keith Melcher and directed by Brett DeJager, is a bit of a mess to be honest. It’s a horror-comedy attempting to tread a similar path to the surprisingly good  Tucker & Dale vs Evil, with its tonal emphasis on the comedy leaving the horror purely to the visuals. Alas, the comedy frequently falls flat and the visuals suffer from clear budgetary restrictions. It’s actually to the movie’s credit that there’s an awful lot going on within the movie’s brisk 78-minute runtime.

Now, some might say – with plenty of justification, mind you – there’s too much going on but, thanks to this, you may well catch Bonejangles one day on The Horror Channel or somewhere like that at two in the morning and have yourself a sweet leaf-assisted blast with it, ahem. Outside of those fairly narrow parameters however, you can probably give it a swerve.