film reviews, interviews, features | BRWC

Author: BRWC

  • Rare Exports: A Christmas Tale – Review

    Rare Exports: A Christmas Tale – Review

    For almost a century the popular persona of a jovial, red-suited, round-faced Father Christmas has been a familiar one for many. Each year, we are led to believe, a kindly old man with supernatural powers finds his way into our rooms and brings us Christmas gifts. It is innocent, traditional and magical. Director Jalmari Helander, however, presents a frightening alternative to the tradition of Christmas Eve, set deep in remote Finland, that will have you quivering under the duvet for weeks.

    Rare Exports begins in a snow drenched Finnish town a few days before Christmas where Pietari and his friend Juuso are spying on an archaeological dig. Believing that the visiting crew are digging up the tomb of Santa Claus Pietari starts to research the origin of the legend and finds out some disturbing secrets. Puzzled and frightened by what he has learnt Pietari tries to warn his friend against the arrival of Santa Claus and hatches all sorts of plans to prevent himself from being seized and spanked on Christmas Eve.

    At this point Rare Exports takes a surprising turn. It moves away from the amusing worries of a child and becomes an entirely more fantastical story. When Pietari wakes up on Christmas morning to see that the bait in his father’s wolf trap has gone, he and his father little suspect the gruesome discovery that they are to find within, or the evil that they are about to encounter. A word of warning to the faint of heart; if you find yourself offended by the sight of exposed elderly men then this film is definitely not for you.

    With trepidation Pietari and his father examine the wounded man that they have dragged from the wolf trap. He has a strange supernatural ability to heal, a bone-chilling way of looking at children and an extremely bedraggled red coat. Little by little Pietari convinces the adults that his fears have come true, they have captured Santa Claus and it’s quickly apparent that he has not come with good intentions.

    It is easy to believe at this point in the plot that Rare Exports has revealed all the surprises that it has to offer but before the finale this unique and intriguing film has even more up its red velvet sleeve. Depicting festive cheer in a challenging and minimalist environment this film is holiday spirit stripped to the bare bones. As an example of Christmas in a different culture it is good and as a completely new reading of the Christmas Eve tradition it’s brilliant. Pietari is a great character, superbly acted, who amuses and impresses. At first intimidated, by the end of the film Pietari is unfazed by the many dangers flung in his way. His character is honest and extremely likeable.

    Rare Exports, though dark, frightening and containing some very real danger for Pietari and his friends, has an extremely witty comic undertone. Like all films with an adolescent central character most of the comedy comes from the amusingly simplistic logic displayed by a child. Rare Exports does however offer something more. The outrageously surreal ending is enough to have you laughing aloud at the sheer audacity of the plot and the final solution to the escapade can only be described as genius.

    This film is well conceived and fantastically made. It brings a completely different feel to a tired and worn out Christmas story and will amuse, entertain and scare the pants off viewers of any age. For the humbugs among us, who reel each year from the festive assault, this is not so much anti-Christmas but certainly Christmas with a twist.

  • Mitsuko Delivers – Review

    Mitsuko Delivers – Review

    Mitsuko Delivers is a wacky Japanese comedy starring Riisa Naka as a pregnant woman finding her way in life. Mitsuko, in the final month of her pregnancy, is very direct when dealing with people, indeed verging on insultingly blunt, but has a fantastic outlook on life which allows her to float free as the clouds from one calamitous situation to the next enriching the lives of all around her as she goes.

    Lying to her parents about being in California (she was there, got pregnant and returned to Japan in secret), Mitsuko is forced to move out of her Tokyo apartment and into a set of ramshackle tenements where she briefly lived as a child. Imposing on her old bedridden landlady she explains it is “Okay. I will impose on you, and you can impose on me”. This is very much her philosophy throughout, willingly giving away the last of her change to a jobless man and then demanding taxi fare from her former landlady. “Nevermind the details” she says, go with the wind. Moving back into the tenements reunites her with Yoichi, played by Aio Nakamura, who had declared that he loved her 15 years previous and vowed to marry her. Yoichi has been waiting all this time for Mitsuko to return and so commits to take care of her child regardless of the situation – even Mitsuko is light on the details of her pregnancy, barely elaborating beyond “I don’t really know, but he was kinda big and really black”.

    It’s in Mitsuko’s, to the point, one liners that the real charm of the comedy lies. That and the continually bizarre web of characters that she weaves around her as she tries to help everyone she meets. Once she puts her mind to something it gets done, merely resolutely stating “Okay” and shouldering the burdens of others – whether they like it or not. As a character she’s marvellously slapstick, ambling around on the verge of giving birth at any minute, but as she says “don’t underestimate me because I’m kinda having a baby”. Don’t be disheartened if you find her a bit rude or annoying to begin with, it just seems that’s her way, and by the end its difficult not to love her.

    As the story layers begin to increase so does the overall insanity, building up into a climax that is gloriously mental. Mitsuko is charming in her blithe disregard for social norms and in her unfailing will to help all around regardless of herself. Mitsuko Delivers starts off slow with few laughs, but once it gets going the madness is delightfully entertaining.

    Mitsuko Delivers is in select theatres May 11 and will be available on DVD July 9.

  • Bolero – Short

    Bolero – Short

    Bolero is a new short film from Denis Brucks that is, in his words,  a ‘unique “concept movie” about an abused boy who breaks free from his miserable life after meeting a mysterious girl who lives beyond a vent in the wall, set to Ravel’s “Bolero”‘.

    Unique is probably the most apt description, it’s beautifully shot using a Red Epic camera, with intense and gripping performances. Starting off slow, the movie follows the pace of the music as it progressively builds, both in intensity and narrative, and as it builds it slowly becomes clear what a bizarre and harrowing story is being portrayed. The movie is entirely dialogue free with the story being told through the imagery on screen in conjunction with the music, and in this context Bolero takes on a very sinister edge, particularly by its dramatic climax.

    There are lengthy periods of slowed down footage which extend movements into an almost dance-like quality. Quick cuts frame the somewhat ambiguous narrative, but give plenty of details for you to fill in the blanks. A boy abused by his family/guardians find comfort in the unexpected source of the altogether unexplained girl that lives behind the wall. She’s chained by the foot, but together they form a bond to overcome their oppressors. Dark, brooding, and violent; this movie exudes an intense atmosphere.

    Bolero is well crafted and definitely worth checking out. Click here, or view the embed below:

     

     

  • 11 Questions With Sybil Danning

    11 Questions With Sybil Danning

    Here we are yet again and the forefront of something wonderful… Namely another celebrity interview! This time with the talented, alluring and legendary Action Queen of the 80’s Sybil Danning!

    Before we dive into the awesomeness though, I will recap, for those who still may not be in the know after my exhaustive build up to this event, (of which there WAS going to be yet another post yesterday, but couldn’t for the life of me get it to work, anywho):

    Sybil Danning is a gorgeous, leggy, buxom, glamazonian, by way of Austria, warrior queen, who also happens to be one of the most brightly shining stars of films of the “B” variety. From Roger Corman’s infamous Star Wars knock off (with special effects work by a pre-fame James Cameron) Battle Beyond the Stars, to the Women in Prison Classics Chained Heat and Reform School Girls, to classier efforts like the Richard Burton starring Bluebeard and trashier epics like Lou Ferrigno’s live action Hercules, Sybil Danning has been bringing her voluminous talents and mega watt screen presence to a wide array of Cinematic Cheese Fests for over 40 years and she’s still going strong. (For yet more info than this check out my Sybil Danning Double Feature articles, here, here and here.)

    So, with out further ado, lets get to know her better!

    No frills.

    Some fluff.

    Little functionality.

    11 Questions, and 11 Questions Only.

    This interview took place via email between myself and Ms. Danning’s representative over the course of last month.

    As per the format of ’11 Questions’ I submitted my questions cold and let the interviewee do the answering. Any “conversational awkwardness” is because of this and is unintentional.

    (The interview has not been edited in any way (for grammar, spelling or otherwise) to make either of us look better.)

    Enjoy!

    DS- I know you started off your professional life in the field of dentistry, what drew you away from that and into acting?

    SD- I loved working in the field of Dentistry for my Uncle in Austria and then later in
    Dental Surgery for one of the most famous Doctor/Professor/Dental Surgeons in the
    European Industry in the top Hospital in Salzburg, Austria. My work in the hospital was 6 day weeks with very low income and long hours. When given the opportunity to work for the Professor in his private practice, working less hours with more pay, I took it. That translated into less but later hours into the evening, never ending before 10-11PM—and sometimes 12 Midnight. I could never go to a dinner, movie, concert or plan anything evenings, so I finally decide to exit a profession I very much liked but not willing to sacrifice a private life for it. I studied, facial treatments, decorative make-up, manicure/pedicure, body massage and received a Diploma in Cosmetology. That led to me working as comestician, running the Cosmetic School which was also a modeling school which I led. Soon I was booking myself as model. One day a photographer called me and told me a movie director was in his office, saw my pictures and I ended up playing my first movie role. It was by mistake, not my planning or even my wish.

    DS- An early “big break” for you as an actress was being cast in the extremely off kilter Richard Burton starring Dark-Comedy/Nazisploitation film Bluebeard, in 1972. I’m a huge fan of Richard Burton, his commanding voice and presence have always thrilled me to no end, even in his lesser works. Was it intimidating for a young actress, somewhat new to the industry to be in the presence of such an icon, or were you as confident and strong willed then as you are now?

    SD– Richard Burton was also one of my favorite actors. His looks, voice, magnetism was absolutely as strong and mesmerizing in person as it was on screen. I had done quite a few films, before, modeled in various countries and traveled from Asia to Africa with never having a problem with cultures or people. Meeting Richard was not intimidating to me and looked forward to it because I had read one of his books and knew much about him. When I met him, did however, feel flush. He invited me to his trailer at the end of the day where we spent hours talking and drinking vodka. We’ve lost a great actor and an even greater man.

    DS- Your first major role as an actress was in Menahem Golan’s Academy Award nominated 1977 release Operation Thunderbolt. In it you performed along side the legendary Klaus Kinski, as a sadistic terrorist. What was it like working with the notoriously fiery Kinski and do you think this role set the standard for your later career as the action queen of the 80s?

    SD– I’m very proud of that movie. First, because we were nominated for an Oscar for Best Foreign Film, aka MIVTSA JONATAN, the Israeli title. Second, because Menachem Golan came to Munich, Germany where I was living, told me we are going to do this movie although 2 others were already in the making and I am going to play the role of the German Terrorist, former member of the Baader Meinhoff Group, Gabrielle Tiedemann. Menachem told me we need the money and who can we cast as my partner in crime, Wilfried Boese? I called Paris, France, convinced Klaus Kinski to play the role as well as a German investor/distributor to fund the entire movie. Unfortunately, I was not given a credit or producing fee which is standard in the business. Because I was not aware at that time, this would be owed me, so I did not ask and I did not get it. I fought the distributor too who did not want Klaus but I put my hand in the fire for him and let him know. He behaved very well and as I knew he would, was magnificent in the movie. The LA TIMES gave us both excellent reviews along with the movie. Mission Accomplished.

    DS- The first movie I saw you in was 1980’s Battle Beyond the Stars, Roger Corman’s infamous “Seven Samurai in Space.” Despite the staggering cast of epic scenery chewers (Robert Vaughn, John Saxon, George Peppard) you sort of steal the movie in your small, but very memorable role as the “extraterrestrial Valkyrie” Saint-Exim. Was this your intention, or were you just having a blast with such an outrageous role (and costume)?

    SD– When I do a movie I never intend or try to outdo anyone or overdo my character. I see everyone as a team and the actors/crews/directors become your family for the short while you work, eat and have fun together. On some movies, it’s very hard and sad to leave the people you enjoyed being with. So, no intention to steal, I admit to your second question. Yes, I was just having great fun flying a spaceship ending as hero jamming John Saxon’s stellar converter and wearing two great costumes. My fans know and love that I always have great costumes. My famous, outrageous Valkyrie outfit was fun but the breast piece cumbersome to keep in place. The battle or “dart” (named after my spaceship) costume took 10 fittings to properly sew the dart shaped holes and secure them with
    buttons. Despite all that work, NBC when airing on TV, still rotoscoped over my entire chest in the spaceship of my hara kiri scene! And so everyone had fun, on and off that movie, except NBC, who said my costume in that scene was too dangerous for airing! What can I tell you, I guess sometimes I’m just a dangerous kind o gal.

    DS- My favorite of the films you’ve starred in is 1983’s Women-In-Prison classic, Chained Heat. I’ve long heard it was a difficult movie and shoot for some of the other actresses, especially Linda Blair, to endure, but you seem to carry your role (and most of your roles) with a winking sense of humor that I love. Have you ever worked on a film, or been placed in a role that was out of your comfort zone?

    SD– Excellent question, actually I think, never asked before! And I really have to give it a moment’s thought! I’m thinking! OK, I went away from this question and now back with the same result– I cannot remember a movie role I did out of my comfort zone. Reason being, I would never take on a role I can’t do justice to. I either like it or don’t do it. Certainly I’ve been in movies where situations could have been better, but who hasn’t. A small example of uncomfortable scenes/situations; My first movie COME MY DEAR LITTLE BIRD, the German fable of “Loreley”, sitting 2 days long on the icy cold November, barren real Rhine river cliff 130 meters high clothed only in long blonde tresses ala “Lady Godiva” freezing to return to Austria with dangerously high fever – my arm scorched by fire burning down my ranch in ALBINO while being raped in a scene we could only shoot once. I still have the scar.

    DS- Also in 1983 you were in the running to land the title role of Octopussy, in Roger Moore’s sixth outing as James Bond. The part of course ended up going to another Model/Actress, Maud Adams. With your strength and tongue in cheek sensibility I think you could have done the part ten times more memorably than Ms. Adams and probably fit in with Moore’s more humorous Bond style a lot more comfortably. Why didn’t you get the part, just one of those things, or did something else happen behind the scenes?

    SD– Thank you, another great question. I know Maud personally and love her. I think role in a James Bond movie. It’s all straight forward, no secrets. I met with Cubby Broccoli for the role. It was a very pleasant meeting, I really liked him and I felt the feeling was mutual. When I got home my agent called to tell me I did not get the role. Though Cubby liked me, he felt my personality was too strong and they needed to go a different way. Some time thereafter, I met Roger Moore in the celebrity hot-spot, Polo Lounge in the Beverly Hills Hotel, had laughs a drink and got along very well. I was thinking, how great our “on screen” chemistry could have been. That’s Hollywood!

    DS- 1985’s The Howling II: Your Sister Is a Werewolf, is most remembered for three things these days, Your stunning performance as “Stirba- She Bitch”, a slumming Christopher Lee and being incredibly bad. Was it surreal working along side someone like Christopher Lee AND participating in the infamous “Werewolf Transformation-Menage a Troi”?

    SD– I’ve done 5 movies with Christopher Lee and I still love him very much which says everything. I did ALBINO, just mentioned above, THREE AND FOUR MUSKETEERS, THE SALAMANDER and lastly, THE HOWLING II. I learned from Christopher, no matter what the character or scene or role you, and only you decide to do, do it well, be true to your character. He does that and I believe I’ve also been true to my characters, in turn, tru to my fans. If I don’t take my characters serious, how can I expect my fans to take them serious? It’s as simple as that, even when you’re, as you mentioned, nude, covered in very fine hair from top to bottom as the only time I become the full fledged werewolf “Queen Stirba” in THE HOWLING II. We all three had fun with that scene and when it was over, I had more black hair than blonde on me. Philippe Mora, the director gave the movie and especially that scene a beautiful atmosphere and so we were quite into it. It also helped the mood shooting in a real castle behind the then, Iron Curtain in Czechoslovakia, now Czech Republic in Eastern Europe.

    DS- You Wrote and Produced 1989’s L.A. Bounty. In it you play a sort of Steven Seagalesque character named Ruger, an ex-cop, turned bounty hunter on the trail of a crazed killer. Unlike Seagal who wrote, produced and directed himself in a number of egocentric vanity projects, your role in the film is very subdued, practically wordless. Was this intentional, or did you just want to play the strong silent type, a sort of “woman with no name”?

    SD– I just like that character very much and saw her as a “Dirty Harry type” which I
    loved. My fans can go to my website www.sybildanning.com to my Newsroom, scroll down to my pic and the link to the music video called “Bullet From a Gun.” My partner Les Thomas who was named “analyst and producer” in the global Video Game Industry by Cloud Computing Journal, and I have a RUGER™ first person shooter Video Game in development. We are also in negotiations with an artist for a RUGER™ comic book, parallel to the game. A completed script is with a powerhouse company under consideration to come in on a RUGER™ movie as well. Fans can go to our new www.sybildanningsruger.com site.

    DS- In the late 80’s, around the time of Sybil Danning’s Adventure Video Series (of which I still own the Ninja Warriors release) you suffered some major health issues while rehearsing a stunt, and were put out of commission for a long, painful, amount of time. What was that time like for you?

    SD– As we must always do in life, I made lemon juice out of lemons given me. I was in a wheel chair, watched the entire gulf war from my hospital bed, had four epidural blocks and ultimately back surgery. While on my back I decided to be creative, wrote a screenplay and did a lot of reading. In the end it gives you even more appreciation for life which can change in a heartbeat. Like a good man, you can only keep a good woman down for a certain amount of time, then we’re back, never looking back.

    DS- There have been very few female action stars of any sort of lasting caliber, but you’re still going strong (and looking timelessly gorgeous as always) to this day. I’d say, at the moment, the only other lady action hero to come close to Sybil Danning is Milla Jovovich. I don’t know if you’ve ever seen any of her work, but if you have I’d love to know how you think she stacks up? (I’d also love to see you both team up on a project, maybe a mother-daughter sort of thing. Hell, I’d love to write it!)

    SD– Thank you for the compliment, I too love her, in particular THE FIFTH ELEMENT, with one of my favorite directors Luc Besson. I’m always happy to see women in action and strong roles. I could see us teaming in a sister-older-sister action movie. Yes, please write it, we need good female actions scripts!

    DS- After such a long, intriguing and exciting career and life, what could the future possibly hold for Sybil Danning that she hasn’t already conquered?

    SD– Oh NO! Damien, you make it sound like I’ve done it all and can quietly go away! I never feel I’ve achieved even closely what I should have or would like to have achieved. You’re very good, but now you’re slipping! Didn’t you see the UK’s #1 horror/sci-fi/fantasy film magazine THE DARK SIDE with me featured on the cover and 4pgs inside with headline “The Bitch is Back,” or recent FANGORIA cover and 4pg feature of me? I feel I have much more to give and the best is yet to come. I am busier than ever, co-writing, producing and preparing to direct my first feature. I’ve directed before but never a feature.

    I just produced and starred in my 1st Music Video, single THE OTHER SIDE, for Chad
    Cherry and THE LAST VEGAS , a rock/heavy metal band just back on tour in Europe and currently touring with Guns & Roses in the US.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GPX-4mf-vO4

    I’ll be directing their next Video and look forward to it. I’m directing and co-producing with Herb Linsey a women in prison movie in preproduction, I will play a role in. The best since CHAINED HEAT! Funny because I was mentioned by guest Dennis Miller on OReilly March 21 for, Chained Heat and Reform School Girls. I thanked Dennis for his mention and am invited to his show – soon!

    I’m in development on BLOOD RELATIONS, a Vampire movie I’m co-directing, coproducing with Neil Johnson and starring in. On a very serious side, I’m in discussion with Bill Chartoff, producer of ROCKY, RAGING BULL, THE RIGHT STUFF and THE MECHANIC with Jason Statham to coproduce SOLIDARITY with me. It’s a political-love story feature film written by the late Daniel Taradash, Academy Award winner best screenplay (FROM HERE TO ETERNITY,) based on LECH WALESA – Leader of Solidarity instigator of Democracy in Europe, winner of the Nobel Peace Prize and proud father of 7. I will play a role as well.

    I’m writing my “Picture Book” to be published when done and parallel my “Memoire” to be published when the ending is right. I’m very proud to say, my editor in chief and dear friend, renowned Author Marshall Terrill, of books such as “Elvis Presley: Still Taking Care of Business” which he’s currently producing the movie titled FAME AND FORTUNE. He also wrote “Steve McQueen: The Life and Legend of a Hollywood Icon” also being adopted for the big screen with Jeremy Renner.

    As of recent I rep gorgeous “Dzmitry Samal’s pixelated hand made designer glasses from Paris, France” go to www.samaldesign.com Please follow me; www.twitter.com/sybildanning , www.myfacebook.com/sybildanning,
    www.sybildanning.net

    Thank you Damien. I feel better than ever, more in control of what I want to do than ever, and until my fans tell me to go away, – The Bitch is Back!

     

    What did I tell you guys? Wonderful, yes?

    She’s a force of nature, and she’s here to be reckoned with! And, as the near end of the interview implied I may be working with Ms. Danning on something, possibly, maybe, sorta kinda in the not too distant future, of the film variety (maybe more than one if everybody is lucky, hehe.) Can’t say for sure on anything, but if our world’s do collide it’s gonna be one hell of a cinematic explosion!

    To be of note the gorgeous headliner photo of Sybil in front of the portrait of Richard Burton (by the way, whoever has that painting needs to get it to me stat, I NEED it) is something Ms. Danning shared with me personally, from her own collection, just based on our mutual affection for Mr. Burton. It was taken during the making of Bluebeard by Elizabeth Taylor’s (at the time Ms. Richard Burton) personal photographer Gianni Bozzacchi.

    And, I’ll leave you all with this lovely image to linger on… It is Ms. Danning in her natural habitat, looking gorgeous and holding a gun… also, it’s personally autographed to me as only Ms. Danning can do.

    Be jealous and stay tuned for more articles, reviews and interviews! Adrienne Barbeau is up next month and her interview is a hot one as well!

    Love,

    Damien

     

  • Sybil Danning Double Feature: Part 3: The Cult

    Sybil Danning Double Feature: Part 3: The Cult

    Yet another installment of Sybil Danning Palooza 2012, leading up to my (fantabulous) interview with the First Lady of Action herself Monday, May 7th!

    This time I’m going to be diving in to what are probably her two most well known films, for better or worse (and so much has been written about them in these sorts of circles I’m not sure what new I can add to the mix, but who cares about that ultimately I suppose?)

    Up first we have The Howling II: Your Sister is a Werewolf from 1985, also known as The Howling II: Boy Does This Suck Ass.

    While the original film from 1981 (written by John Sayles and Directed by Joe Dante, of Piranha and Gremlins fame, with GOREgeous FX by maestro Rob Bottin) is a classic of the horror genre (well, comedy/horror genre) the second most decidedly is not a classic of anything, except for maybe lupine menage a trois enthusiasts…

    Plot wise it loosely follows the events of the first in that (SPOILERS) after the transformation of (lead character/heroine of that film) news reporter Karen White into a werewolf and her subsequent denouement (on live television) at the end of the original, her brother, his girlfriend and some random occult expert (played by a slumming, totally, visibly embarrassed Christopher Lee) go off to “the dark country” to find the queen of the werewolves (Sybil Danning, known in the film as Stirba- Werewolf Bitch) and kill them all for good… or something like that.

    The story, the dialog, the photography, the effects, the music and 90% of the performances are nauseatingly, mind numbingly bad. Like I really cant describe to you how bad… Actually, I can Madonna’s acting level bad.

    Basically, the movie is an abortion, lovingly captured on muddy film stock and shoved in your face. It is terrible with a capital T.

    Yet, I’ve watched it at least 12 times in my life and probably will do so a couple more times before I die.

    Why?

    Is it so horrific that it becomes watchable, as so many of the other films I review are?

    No, not really.

    It is truly just downright awful. But it has Christopher Lee debasing himself on film AND Sybil Danning in a two girl, one guy, transforming into werewolves as they fuck, threeway. Huh? Yeah. That’s right.

    It’s not so much a movie as it is a rite of passage. It’s one of those things that must be experienced. And once you experience it, you love it. You shouldn’t, but you do.

    Also, the end title credits humorously feature the same shot of Sybil removing her top over and over again and that’s always a plus. AND really, I give Christopher Lee a hard time but he was MUCH more uncomfortable in Curse III: Blood Sacrfice (as anyone would be.) Everyone’s gotta get paid sometimes, right? Sybil, as always is wonderful and underused as Stirba, playing the part, what little there is, with much relish. And there are a couple of overused shots of a pretty local clock that looks like a dead child playing a drum that help make the thing semi-possibly-maybe worth watching… kind of.

    But, not really.

    Anyways, up next is an actual good one, that I love all the way around, Reform School Girls, from 1986.

    The film is supposedly a “parody” of the Women in Prison film, but really it’s more of a Women in Prison film with a heightened sense of humor, as most of the “serious” stuff that happens comes across as pretty brutal and intense.

    It follows all the rules of the genre, innocent or mostly innocent young girls get thrown into nightmarish, over the top prison (in this case the world’s most prison like Reform School), they are stripped, bullied, humiliated, there is some lesbianism and then they must battle the people who run the place to get out or die tryin’.

    However, unlike most other films in this subgenre, who frequently induce unintended giggles you’re supposed to laugh at how over the top everything is this go round, for the most part. That and the truly classic, Shakespearean in magnitude dialog; featuring such chestnuts as “Keep your fingers above the sheets girls, we only wash em once a week.” “Girl #1: Edna and Charlie have an understanding. Girl #2: Yeah, Charlie’s under and Edna’s standing.” and “Wanna play carnival?… Come sit on my face and I’ll guess your weight.”

    The direction by veteran genre “auteur” Tom DeSimone and look of the film is crisp and almost cartoonish, in an appealing way. It has a kick ass mid-80’s punk rock soundtrack (featuring a few tracks by the legendary Wendie O’ Williams, who also stars in the film as the world’s most geriatric 16 year old.) And the acting is all around great for this sort of thing, especially the scene stealing performances of Pat Ast (as the bitchy, bull dyke, foul mouthed Chief of Staff Edna) and of course Sybil Danning (as the leather clad, icy, evil, overbearing, bible quoting Warden Sutter.)

    As almost always is the case, there isn’t enough Sybil for my tastes, but this is how B-Movies were back in the day… Could only afford but so much awesome at a time.

    The Howling II 2 out of 10 randomly exploding midget eyeballs

    Reform School Girls 7 out of 10 burning bunny dolls