Pattinson, Aladdin, Moranis: Weekly Round Up

17th February 2020

Pattinson, Aladdin, Moranis: Weekly Round Up. For reasons unbeknown to me, and to presumably anyone who hasn’t been living with a bag over their head and noise cancelling headphones over their ears since 2008, Robert Pattinson’s casting as Bruce Wayne/Batman in the upcoming Matt Reeves movie, The Batman, continues to be met with negativity.

Fanboys like to say things like, “Batman doesn’t sparkle,” as if they’re the first people on the planet to observe that, y’know, Twilight was a thing and it was shit. Spoilers to all those fanboys: you’re not, we all know. It’s not like it’s a secret.

But Pattinson has been doing some crazy interesting things since he first come to prominence as the glitter-vamp, and he’s more than proven his skill and talent at the craft of acting. In fact, last year he appeared in Robert Eggars absolutely bat-shit (see what I did there?) The Lighthouse opposite Willem Dafoe, and let me tell you, dear reader, he’s come a long way from Cedric Digory.

News on The Batman has been dropping sporadically since it was announced, but this week we finally got our first look at Pattinson in the title role. Director Matt Reeves dropped a short teaser showcasing the costume and… well, it’s a little bit weird, actually.

It seems to showcase both the costume and the new score from composer Michael Giacchino, but there are a couple of odd observations to be made.

The score seems to confirm the idea that this is going to be a far more neo-noir based, detective style Batman than we have seen previously, with a techno feel and some noirish undertones. I’m not totally sold on it yet, but it does the job for now. The weirdest bit, however, is the decision to bathe the whole thing a strong red light, leading fans to note the costume comparisons to Netflix’s now cancelled Daredevil series. This is likely down to the use of the red, and in it’s “truer” color I suspect the costume won’t look anything like it, but then there is also the odd decision not to show the ears, arguably the most iconic part of the Dark Knight’s appearance…

Either, I’m still damn excited about this film. Reeves is a great filmmaker, Pattinson one of the most interesting actors working today, and the supporting cast is… well, it’s pretty bloody great.

You know what isn’t great, though? Aladdin.

Not the Disney original, that’s pretty much a classic at this point (although personally I’m not sure it’s much of anything other than a great Robin Williams showcase), but the live-action remake that kicked itself onto screens last year and demanded to be taken seriously.

That film was an utter mess, and a really bizarre choice for director Guy Ritchie (who, incidentally, had clear been put on a leash and told to behave by the Disney overlords… like, why bother hiring him?), but somehow managed to make big bucks at the box office. Because of that Disney are fast-tracking a sequel. So… you have only yourselves to blame for this one, really. Seriously, go see good movies, and then we won’t have to deal with this shit.

Not much is known about the sequel beyond the fact that it won’t be a remake of the original sequels. We do know, however, that Disney have kicked out the screenwriter’s responsible for inflicting the horror on us last year, and have replaced them with John Gatins, the man behind Power Rangers and Real Steel, and Andrea Berloff, writer of World Trade Centre and co-writer on Straight Outta Compton.

If you think those credits are going to give us any insight to the direction this might be taking, now you know how confused I was when Ritchie was announced as director of the first one. We don’t know if Ritchie will return for the sequel, but we do know it won’t be Disney Plus because, I guess, it’s that important or something….

Speaking of projects that won’t be appearing on Disney Plus, turns out that, despite speculation, the new, Josh Gadd starring, Shrunk (an update of the Honey, I Shrunk the Kids movie starring Rick Moranis) is getting a theatrical release instead.

The film is set to be a sort of sequel/reboot, with Gadd playing the son of Moranis’ character from the original and it’s sequels. Given Moranis is something of a recluse, many – myself included – were wondering how the film would tackle the characters. Turns out Disney have waved their magic wand (or handed over a gigantic cheque), and Moranis is actually returning to the franchise for a cameo role.

And let me tell you, this news means that this film went from bottom of my interests to right up near the top with that alone. And has also made me wonder… is Moranis going to be in the new Ghostbusters movie too?

Our final story this week, and by far the most curious, is the news that we’ll be getting yet another Texas Chain Saw remake.

The Texas Chain Saw Massacre has one of the most confusing continuities outside of Halloween, especially when it comes to horror, what with the original, it’s sequels, the remake series and the so-called “alternative series”.

Well, it looks like it’s about to get even more confusing, because Legendary Pictures, the studio behind the recent Godzilla and Kong films (why aren’t we all more behind that series, by the way? What the f**k is wrong with modern audiences?) are looking to dig up the Sawyer family for another violent outing.

This movie is set to be produced by Fede Alvarez, which is where this project really becomes interesting, Alvarez is the man behind the excellent Evil Dead remake and the suspenseful and shocking Don’t Breathe. He has stated he wants the movie to be “violent, exciting, and so depraved it’ll stay with you forever”, which all sounds… fine, I guess. Tobe Hooper’s original movie, while featuring absolutely no onscreen gore, is one of the most unsettling films ever made, so it appears like he’s on the right track.

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