I was one of the eleven people who saw the Quentin Tarantino/Robert Rodriguez homage to B Movies Extravaganza ‘Grindhouse‘ on opening day. I LOVED Rodriguez’s half of the experiment (Planet Terror) and loathed Tarantino’s (Death Proof.) In the middle of the two films, however, were the best bits. Several fake trailers, in similar over the top, blood stained, gritty good old fashioned ridiculousness: Eli Roth’s Thanksgiving, Edgar Wright’s Don’t, Rob Zombie’s Werewolf Women of the SS and lastly, the one everyone was talking about afterwards (and the one to be made into a film first), Robert Rodriguez’s Machete.Machete the film, much like the trailer, is a series of over the top, giggle inducing, hyper-violent set pieces, strung together at a brisk pace by a convoluted, overly melodramatic plot.

There is a crazed, redneck, illegal immigrant hating Senator (Robert DeNiro ACTUALLY seeming to have fun for a change) and his insidious, power mad aide (the brilliant Jeff Fahey.) There is a sociopathic drug lord with a penchant for decapitating his enemies (a surprisingly amazing Steven Seagal.) A rather good, but underused Lindsay Lohan dressed as a gun-toting nun. Cheech Marin, stealing scenes as always, as a deadly, foul mouthed priest. And the incomparably awe inspiring (yet also underused) Don Johnson as a sly, cigar chomping vigilante, just to name a few of the interesting faces and characters that move the whole film along.

All that should be incentive enough to make you want to see the film. But really, in the end, if you’re a fan of old school, Charles Bronson style, over the top 70’s revenge/action flicks, Machete is for you. It’s a gloriously tongue in cheek exercise in B-Film entertainment. It has enough blood letting, boobs and bad assery for 10 Movies and it flies along at such a brisk clip you wont even care that it all doesn’t make a lick of sense.

Throw your pretensions out the door, pony up the dough and go see Machete right now if you want to have a good time at the movies. Period.

10 out of 10 “Introducing Don Johnson” Credits