By Peter “Pops” Killip.

When the words “…..but what I REALLY saw it as was part of a trilogy!” are uttered, it’s usually by hack-for-hire types who inadvertently stumbled upon a solid unforeseen hit or once great film makers just hedging their bets, either way, it’s rarely from the audience and rarer still cause for an outbreak of high fives.
However, when comic scribe and general Daily Mail botherer Mark Millar broke the news about his ultra violent, C-bomb dropping graphic Novel “Kick Ass”, it was call for celebration, especially as the opener had been adapted for the big screen so successfully by Director and Claudia Schiffer banger; Matthew Vaughn and Jane Goldman on screenwriting duties. Shit, if those two could come back for a repeat visit then now may be a good time to invest in bottled lightning collections.

Then along came “X Men; First Class”…..A cracking little 60’s set origins type romp with the writer/director team on top form and more than a little Connery era Bond thrown into the Magneto mix. Understandably it did reasonably well so the likelihood of seeing those two go back to the “Kick Ass” well was getting smaller and smaller.

The sequel to “Kick Ass” (if You don’t include spin-off “Hit Girl”) on page, having gotten the preliminaries out of the way, is broader in scope, opens up a whole plethora of “real world” Super-Hero/Villain possibilities, has bigger and NASTIER deaths (dogs don’t come off too well either….), an ending that echoes “The Dark Knight” and “The Empire Strikes Back” and with erm….gang rape at one point. It’d have to be a pretty ballsy Director to take the helm of the good ship “Kick Ass 2”.

Awkward silence as Jeff (He of channel 5 clogging gems; “Cry Wolf” and Karate Kid scene borrowing “Never Back Down”, yeah me neither. ) Wadlow bellies up to the bar with a Robinson’s Fruit Shoot in hand.
As Vaughn agreed to stay on in an Exec Producer capacity only, Christ on a cross, this doesn’t bode well.

Now I don’t know what goes on behind closed doors at “Universal” studios but I can understand how they wouldn’t fancy seeing universally (no pun intended) loved funny man Jim Carrey being decapitated and having a dog’s head shoved on his neck stump in the middle of one of their summer blockbusters and I dare say the gang rape scene would have been way off the mark and their exclusion is fair. However; COME THE FUCK ON; The inclusion of a 2 minute scene where “Hit Girl” is introduced to the “charms” of “Union Fucking J” via what I can only imagine was introduced to Ludlow during his time in the “How to torpedo the shit out of an already struggling movie” masterclass.

It’s not a completely wasted exercise, Jim Carrey gives good mental and when the film realises that the “Hit” is more crowd pleasing than the “Girl” in the story, it kicks in a gear or two. With the leaner running time and what felt like apologetically tying up of loose ends with an ending that should have been a gut punch but resulted in a ham fisted hand shake…..They done fucked it up. Wadlow can go and suck a dick….. What I really wanted to see it as, was a trilogy.

3 pops Heads.

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