Author: Alton Williams

  • Alien Vs Ninja: Review

    Alien Vs Ninja: Review

    Review by Big Rich.

    A group of Ninjas are stalked by an Alien in a forest. Hilarity ensues! That’s it, if you thought the title left little to the imagination you should try giving up the 90min or so I did watching the thing. Films like this should be better, AvNhad a lot of charm, effort had gone into it. The wire work in the fight scenes, especially the odd zombie-ninja-controlled-by-alien in the last act, was pretty good.

    The gore was thrown in great pink and red handfuls as Ninjas and Aliens alike were cut, stabbed, gutted, slashed, punched, dismembered, and ridden like a rodeo pony….that needs to be seen to be believed. The 4 main characters were typical of these films, the angry one, the quiet one, the tubby comic relief and the woman.

    Who was plagued by not only aliens but by crash zooms on her bum and at one point an amorous alien infatuated by her bosom. The Alien itself was a direct RidleyScott rip off, apart from having the head of a dolphin and gummy sweets teeth. If your going to have inhabitants be terrified and screaming then at least have an alien with the goods to do so.

    I wanted this film to be so bad it was good but a horrendous script, shoddy humor and a production budget that was at least £2.38 meant what little charm it had at the opening power rangers meets kill bill fight scene was all dried up by the credits. I will say this though before tonight I’d never seen an Alien fight a Ninja.

  • The Rebound: Review


    Ok. So. This film? Was surprising. I am a big lover of romantic comedies. All but three of my DVD collection are romantic comedies. But when I saw who was in this film; Catherine Zeta Jones; I shrugged my shoulders. I’m not the biggest fan of her films. Not because she’s a bad actress, I just don’t warm well to what she’s played a part in. I started off watching this with the intention of me turning it off. 95 minutes later and I’m balling my eyes out at the ending. It’s bizarre, funny, awful, messy, loving and uplifting. I cringed at a certain part of the film. The cliche ”kid finds mum & stranger having ‘dirty-nothings’ on the sofa” scenario. I laughed at other parts. The children in this film are quite genius. Obviously ”too old for their age”, and just too cute. Then there was the ending where, yes, I cried. The part where many years later the couple find themselves in, oh wait, yes, the same restaurant. The guy has been off on a journey of self discovery and returned with a child he’s picked up. (Who by the way is also adorable). And then somehow, everything is fine again, and I’m assuming everything starts back up again. It’s your average romantic comedy. But with a twist. A bizarre twist, of a lady in her 40’s and a guy in his 20’s who inevitably fall in love. We all know what’s going to happen. ”Hello, this is weird, oh wait this is happening, oh gosh i’ve fallen in love with you, oh no this can’t happen, i’m leaving, uh oh i’ve found you again”. But without a doubt, films like this just seem to work, and make you feel warm inside, even if you can’t stand the lead actor/actress. If you don’t like romantic comedies, but your other half wants to watch it, really, don’t watch it. But if you like romantic comedies and your curious, just give it a go. Even I was surprised at the end.

    © BRWC 2010.

  • Quote Of The Week : The Green Mile (1999)


    On the day of my judgement, when i stand before God, and he asks me why did i kill one of his true miracles – what am i gonna say ? That is was my job ?



    Paul Edgecomb (Tom Hanks) speaking with emotion to John Coffey (Michael Clarke Duncan) just prior to his execution in the electric chair. Writer Director Frank Darabont’s take on a Stephen King novel is long but compelling with powerful scenes.

    © BRWC 2010.

  • Film Review with Robert Mann – Sanctum 3D

    Sanctum 3D **½
    Sanctum 2D *½

    “From executive producer James Cameron, creator of Titanic and Avatar” – these words have been plastered all over the marketing for Sanctum 3D and the simple association of Cameron with the film will undoubtedly create a certain level of expectation as to the standard of filmmaking that is on offer here. Do not be fooled though – this is NOT a James Cameron movie.

    Cameron’s only role here is that of an executive producer, with him being involved in neither the writing nor the direction, and while the Fusion 3D camera system that he developed for and used in the shooting of Avatar was used to make this film, the same was also true of 3D films such as Resident Evil: Afterlife and Tron Legacy, neither of which claimed to have any involvement from Cameron. It is perhaps possible that Cameron’s involvement simply has something to do with his love of underwater exploration – after all, while he was developing the 3D technology to do Avatar he made two IMAX 3D documentaries in which he went beneath the ocean in a submersible to film the wonders that lie below, Ghosts of the Abyss and Aliens of the Deep – but, regardless of the reason for his association with this film, it doesn’t change the fact that this is not his film. Rather, the director is Alister Grierson, whose only previous directorial credit, aside from several shorts, is 2006 Australian war movie Kokoda: 39th Battalion and the screenplay is written by first time writer John Garvin (who also appears among the film’s cast) along with Andrew Wight, whose only previous filmmaking experience has been as a producer in numerous TV nature documentaries as well as Cameron’s two 3D underwater documentaries and who was involved in the real events which have inspired this film when he and fourteen other people who went cave diving became trapped in a cave for two days and had to look for another way out after their entrance collapsed. At the beginning of the film a message reads “This film is inspired by a true story” so, despite Wight having being involved in the real events, it is almost certain that liberties have been taken in the telling of the story on screen. So, Cameron’s movie this may not be but many people may well go in expecting an experience to rival Avatar. Does this film deliver it? Don’t count on it.

    Frank McGuire (Richard Roxburgh) is an expert cave diver who is on the verge of a major breakthrough as he explores the largest cave system in the world, one that is completely unexplored by man. He knows that what he does comes with risks and is well aware of the dangers that lay ahead but he never lets his team – George (Dan Wyllie), Judes (Allison Cratchley), Luko (Cramer Cain), J.D. (Christopher Baker) and Jim (John Garvin) – down, always trusting his know-how to see him and his team through. All his experience, however, cannot prepare him for what happens when a cyclone hits, flooding the caves and forcing them deep into the caverns with no way out but down. Now, his team of adrenalin junkies, including his 17-year-old son Josh (Rhys Wakefield), financier Carl Hurley (Ioan Gruffudd) and Carl’s mountain climbing girlfriend Victoria (Alice Parkinson), must survive raging torrents of water, deadly terrain and depleting oxygen levels as they desperately make their way further into the caves towards the ocean in a bid to escape. But the underwater labyrinth has plenty of nasty surprises in store for these intrepid adventurers, ones that will challenge the most hardcore of thrill-seekers. Will they all make it out alive?

    Sanctum 3D is a film that offers only one thing that actually makes it worth seeing and the clue is in the title. With James Cameron’s name attached and his Fusion camera system being used in filming you would at least expect top quality 3D and for the most part the film does deliver in this department, the 3D here generally being very good. As you would expect the 3D here is true 3D not a mediocre post production conversion job and, taking the approach of purely beyond the window 3D with nothing coming towards or out of the screen, the 3D is used to take us on a journey to another world – just like with Avatar but this time the world we are taken to is on Earth not some distant alien planet – one that is full of beautiful locations, both outside of and inside the caves. 3D is a great tool for showing us exotic locales that are untainted by man and here it is utilised quite superbly at times, bringing the environments featured on screen to vivid life. Before events move into the caves, the 3D vividly brings to life some quite exotic locations, albeit only briefly, and when events move into the cave system the beauty continues with the 3D making it seem like there really is an entire system of caves behind the cinema screen and, in scenes that take place underwater, like the cinema screen is the wall of a giant water tank and all the events we are seeing are taking place within it. In particular, the sight of a giant cave completely underwater is stunning and the film delivers many money shots such as this one that make the film extremely appealing for the eyes, showing us the kind of places many of us could only ever dream of actually going to and seeing in person – this film is almost like there actually being there. The 3D also proves to be an effective tool in other aspects, heightening the sense of claustrophobia in scenes where the characters find themselves in tight squeezes and also enhancing the sense of fear by allowing us to experience how deep the caves are first hand, something which gives us a greater understanding of the peril that the characters are in. The 3D visuals are breathtaking and ensure that, in visual terms at least, the film is quite an experience but the 3D is all there really is to the film and if you take it away, while the cinematography may still prove quite appealing, the film will likely lose its impact. The one area where the 3D doesn’t contribute much is in the conversation based scenes, of which of there are far too many, and this is where the film’s failings begin. The dialogue is abysmal, the lines the actors have to speak being some of the most cringe worthy I’ve heard since last year’s The Last Airbender – for instance, one character says “What could possibly go wrong diving in caves?”, something I doubt anyone with even half a brain would actually say something in real life – and scenes of conversation are so badly scripted as to make sitting through them completely tedious, such scenes really beginning to drag after a while. To make matters worse, apparent attempts to make us care about the characters fail with the characterisation are so poor as to make it virtually impossible to actually give a damn about what happens to any of the characters, there being no emotional connection with any of them. And with awful writing tends to come awful acting. The acting is largely dreadful with only a few cast members proving tolerable, Richard Roxburgh and Ioan Gruffudd emerging as the better performers and the general standard here is more the level that would expect to find in a cheesy television advert or an Australian soap opera than a mainstream movie. Add to the lowsy acting the fact that, when everyone dons their diving suits and heads underwater, it becomes hard to tell who is who and that, even as characters are dying, there is a complete absence of dramatic tension, not to mention an extremely convenient plot device that coming into play at the end, and you have a film that may well emerge as frontrunner as the next Razzies for its poor writing. The fact that John Garvin has no writing experience at all and that Andrew Wight is a cave diver, rather than a writer, probably goes some way to explain why the writing is so bad but hardly excuses the poor quality on display in this film or the fact that James Cameron has any association with it. So, the dazzling visuals on display in Sanctum 3D provide something of a distraction from the mediocrity on display elsewhere but when the 3D taken out of the equation the magnitude of these failings would become all the more evident. Like Avatar this is a film that delivers a breathtaking visual experience but unlike that film there is no heart or soul, this being a film that is often stunningly spectacular in terms of its visuals and quite enjoyable at times but dig deeper and you will find something every bit as hollow as the caves that are featured in it.

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    Review by Robert Mann BA (Hons)

    © BRWC 2010.

  • The Reef

    So here’s the trailer for The Reef… 




    A post jaws man hunter thriller. Although to be fair in the world of water related man-eating shark infested big screen affairs there is only ‘Before Jaws’ which I will not degrade to the acronym ‘BJ’ and ‘After Jaws’. The former chronological period consisting of the classic 50’s ‘B’ movie Attack Of The Killer Goldfish and… nothing else.


    Here’s a small cast and crew clip for anyone interested.


    © BRWC 2010.