Jane Doe is the name given to a body of a deceased person who can’t be identified. In the brilliant chiller The Autopsy of Jane Doe, it is the corpse of a young woman, who, outwardly, appears to have suffered no harm. It is only when the autopsy begins, that a mysterious and terrifying chain of events is set off.
We’ve reproduced is the autopsy report for Jane, and for some other famous bodies from film and TV, from Twin Peaks to Sunset Boulevard – each of which might lie inert, but play a key role in unravelling some classic and thrilling stories.
FILM: THE AUTOPSY OF JANE DOE (2017)
Name: Jane Doe
Background: Unknown; no identification, so unable to establish. Early twenties, female
Cause of death: Unknown. Body found buried in earth in basement of home where multiple homicides had occurred. Perfectly preserved, no sign of trauma.
Killer: Unknown (see above)
Officer(s) in charge of investigation: Sheriff Burke
Case status: Ongoing, pending post mortem report from Tilden Funeral Home. Contact with Tildens currently cut off due to electrical storm.
Based on the international best seller by Fredrik Backman, it is fair to say that Hannes Holm’s A Man Called Ove has landed on its feet with nothing less than a European Film Award for Best European Comedy and two Oscar nominations for Best Foreign Language Film and Best Makeup and Hairstyling.
Ove’s story would be the paradigm of the bittersweet comedy starred by the grumpy old man next door. He is the ruthless vigilante of his residential area in Sweden making no differences between humans, cats, cars and cigarette butts. Nothing escapes Ove and you better watch your bike if left alone in the pedestrians’ area, because even if it’s a present for your girlfriend in the making, you won’t see it again if it gets on this man’s path; a man whose love for Saab is only leveled by his hate for any other car in the world. However, there’s something else in Ove’s mind after having recently lost his wife, Sonja, and being compulsory retired from work: killing himself.
And here, I’m afraid he isn’t as proficient as he is being the sheriff of his neighborhood. Ove, one could say, has earned the right of being grumpy after a series of tragedies in his life: the loss of his dad at an early age; the accident that left her wife in a wheelchair, losing their son in the way; the silent war with his old best pal for the presidency of the neighbor’s community… It’s a comedy, remember?
So when Pregnant Parvaneh (Bahar Pars) and her fool-of-a-husband come along holding hands with two half Iranian half Swedish little girls, Ove starts to grasp that maybe Sonja will have to wait a bit more than expected.
The movie starts with two indicators of what the spectator is about to see:
An initial scene in which Ove argues with a florist’s clerk because he is unable to understand the 2×1 concept; and a beautiful shot of him crossing a railway at dawn, in his way to the cemetery to see Sonja. I.e. A sober and beautifully shot comedy of tragic implications.
As Eric Idle taught us in another comedy of British craft: Always look on the bright side of life. That is precisely what this movie bases his theme on, while portraying an ode to the little beauties of being alive and sharing your love with the ones surrounding you. It’s genuinely funny, sweet and sometimes sour. It shows a good balance between clichés, new takes on old jokes and unique little situations only found in a very northern European setting.
Needless to say, the movie is not perfect: despite his 116 minutes, it sometimes fails in properly planting little subplots that will eventually pay off playing an important role in the resolution of the story; as well as falling in classical mistakes of this kind of movies (such as trying to be too sweet, too funny or too bitter).
However, as its implacable festival run and accolades show, A Man Called Ove it’s a great genre piece and, after all, a heartwarming and thought provoking film to be enjoyed and slowly digested amidst the remakes, super hero movies and shallow 3D super productions that populate the hoardings.
Emma (Elizabeth Healey, Mum’s List) is a high-powered solicitor, struggling to make it home through London during a(nother) tube strike. Ryan (Keir Charles, Man Up), is one of those fellows who create interesting sculptures out of sand on the edges of the river Thames when the tide is out. Emma has a hundred things to do, not least of which is to make it to her daughter’s birthday party. Ryan has nowt to do past maybe picking up some bits from Tesco when he’s done digging sandcastles, if he can remember. Failing to hail any of the black cabs already heaving with what would’ve been rail commuters and having already found herself heading the wrong way on a river ferry, Emma stops along the South Bank to take a call from a harried subordinate at work and promptly drops her phone over the embankment and straight into Ryan’s water bucket. As she rushes down the nearby steps to retrieve her mobile, we sense that a “meet-cute” is about to rear its head. And it is, sort-of. But it also isn’t, because Emma and Ryan have already met, many years ago. Ryan was Emma’s first love. They haven’t seen or heard from one another since they broke up.
Across The River
It takes a second for the recognition to kick in but, when it does, Ryan is delighted. Emma, whilst cordial, is more pensive. The initial exchange of greetings is stilted and Emma can’t seem to get away quick enough, a smile failing to mask her apparent desire for the Earth to open up and swallow her. How many of us have been there? Almost all of us, I’d imagine. Emma makes her excuses and begins to head for nearby Waterloo station, but Ryan decides he’s finished playing in sand for the day and invites himself to tag along with her. However, the tube strike has closed Waterloo down altogether and Emma’s still stuck. No matter; she can borrow Ryan’s bicycle to get home. But, oh noes! Some rascal has stolen Ryan’s front wheel, again. Well, Ryan will just help Emma flag down a taxi. But Emma already tried that and those black cabs aren’t any less packed than they were earlier. What about a bus? Let’s wait for a bus.
Across The River
As they wait, they begin to make small talk. Have you been on holiday this year? Yes, Thailand. Enjoy it? Yes. Have you been? No, never made it. If it wasn’t already fairly apparent looking solely at their career trajectories since last they met, it’s becoming clear – certainly to Emma – that they have become quite different people.
You can never go home again. Still, as their attempts to find Emma some transport home turn into a pedestrian road trip across the United Kingdom’s beautiful capital, small talk quickly turns to real talk, about what happened way back when; about things which hadn’t been spoken about yet, and which should’ve been, long since. Emma’s pensive because she’s mad at Ryan, and she’s mad because he left her, bailing on her without a word because of insecurities he was carrying about who he was and who he thought she deserved. Can they both make peace with a break-up they both regret before they can get Emma home? They’re going to try, and we’re going to stick with them while they do.
Across The River
Across the River, by first-time feature writer/director Warren B. Malone, is a charming and intimate micro-slice of life, its ambitions no loftier than dropping us in on a chance meeting ‘twixt two former lovers, and staying with them just long enough to watch that meeting play out. Why do we want to stay to see them work out their past? One reason is certainly that the principals are relatable and sweet; Elizabeth Healey initially wounded, visibly lighting up as her guard comes down, and the affable Keir Charles channelling his inner Martin Freeman, both of them improvising their dialogue as they go. Another reason might be that the beautiful South Bank of the Thames in the daytime is a great place to want to hang out and we get to do just that throughout Across the River. I think though that the main reason we want to watch these guys bury the hatchet and find a good place from whence to view the life they had together is that we’d all like to be granted that opportunity; however well-meant we may have been, we’ve all flubbed the end of a relationship. We wanted to ride off into the sunset and instead we fell off the back of the horse and into the horseshit. Across the River gives us that second go at “Good-bye” we’d all like to have taken, at least once.
Across the Riverenjoys its London Premiere at theEast End Film Festivalon the 18th of June, 2017.
Films have been focused on martial arts for a long time, and who can blame them? With talented men and women who are able to perform the fight scenes and directors who have the vision to make their stories come to life, these films can transport viewers to places far away while reminding us what the human body is capable of.
Though few of us will ever be Tony Jaa or Bruce Lee, here are five movies that every martial artist should watch. These movies are fun and full of action and some great fights.
Kickboxing
Kickboxing movies can be a lot of fun. In 1995, Savate was released. Savate is very similar to many Westerns, but it has a disillusioned soldier who ends up fighting for the underdog using kickboxing, plus a cast that includes Oliver Gruner, James Brolin, and Michael Palance, Savate is worth a watch.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j7d_UacumGk
In 2003, Tony Jaa starred in Ong-Bak, a film that uses Thai kickboxing. It not only has action and great stunts but looks gritty and real. Tony Jaa did his own stunts and he trained for four years in Muay Boran, the form of martial arts that came before Muay Thai, to get ready for his role.
Kung Fu and Bruce Lee
Once Upon a Time in China was released in 1991 and stars Jet Li as Wong Fei Hung, a legendary Chinese hero who fights to defend China from other nations that are taking advantage of it. He fights the colonizers with the weapons at hand. As a student of kung fu, his skills are the weapon he possesses, but can he succeed against the imperial powers in China? A fun movie, some have given it credit for reminding us all how awesome kung fu could be.
Enter the Dragon, released in 1973 and starring Bruce Lee, is another movie that every martial artist should see. Not only was Bruce Lee a master in kung fu, judo, and karate, he was graceful and poised. While it is not on every best martial arts movie list, it is on most of them. Gritty and violent, the movie is just like a movie focused on a martial arts tournament with spies and a crime lord should be. Plus, Enter the Dragon showcases the incredible talent of Bruce Lee.
The Matrix
1999’s The Matrix borrows quite a bit from martial arts movies of the 1970s and 1980s. Star Keanu Reeves trained with Woo-Ping Yuen, a fight choreographer who had worked with Jackie Chan. Because Reeves’ character had different martial arts styles downloaded into his brain – jiu-jitsu, savate, kung fu, kempo, and tae kwon do – Reeves had to be trained, to some extent, in each of these styles. Despite this, the fighting style of the movie was still unique because of the setting and characters. This makes The Matrix a fun movie to watch for any martial artist.
Watching the masters at work, or seeing the work that masters have put into training and choreographing a fight can be a learning experience. Knowing the work that goes into these scenes can help a martial artist appreciate them even more.
Over the years there have been plenty of giant, terrifying beasts that have been concocted in the imaginations of some of the world’s greatest filmmakers. Having graced the silver screen, many of these creatures have burrowed themselves into the minds of audience members for years after, playing on fears related to much wider social and cultural issues. Most evident is the infamous ‘face-hugger’ and ‘chest buster’ from Alien, the concept of which plays on the fear of pregnancy; whilst Godzilla was quite clearly a metaphor for city-destroying bombs.
The latest batch of flesh-eating creatures to bless audiences with their presence comes from the epic fantasy action feature, The Great Wall, which arrives on Digital, 4k Ultra HD, 3D Blu-Ray™, Blu-Ray™, DVD and On Demand from June 12, 2017.
To celebrate the release, we’re taking an in-depth look at the history of monsters in cinema, and attempting to get to the bottom of who is the most bad-ass beasty of them all!
Frankenstein (1931)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aKoPr-Q7QSk
Before monsters that could scale buildings and trample cars made their way to the big screen, monsters that terrified audiences were much more relatable and human-like. Put this down to budgetary or technological constraints if you wish, but this most likely revolves around people becoming paranoid about their human counterparts between Europe’s world wars. “Frankenstein” is the name of the mad scientist who creates a monster by taking body parts from dead people. Upon placing a brain inside the head of the monster, the doc is amazed to find that his experiment is alive. When the monster breaks free and mistakenly kills Maria, a young girl he meets down by the river, the town is up in arms and aims to bring Frankenstein’s monster to justice, only to find it attempting to kill his maker in an abandoned windmill. This could symbolise fear of parenthood around the age of the perfect suburban family in the US.
King Kong (1933)
Being one of the first giant monsters to wreak havoc on an unsuspecting city, King Kong has managed to cement himself in popular culture as one of the most powerful beasts in modern fiction. He is first discovered by filmmaker Carl Denham (Robert Armstrong), who stumbles across the 50ft tall ape on the mysterious Skull Island, whilst natives perform a sacrifice for the beast. Once the big man catches a glimpse of the beautiful Ann Darrow (Fay Wray), he goes on a rampage in order to win her heart, which involves him snatching her up at any chance he gets and taking her as far away from any other man as he can. Jealousy issues much? The tale of Kong has since been re-told in many different ways and eras, but has always managed to emote a certain amount of sympathy for the beast, who in the end was killed by love.
Godzilla, King of the Monsters (1956)
Filmed in 1954 as Gojira, this granddaddy of all Japanese giant-reptile epics was picked up for American distribution two years later, at which time several newly filmed inserts – featuring Raymond Burr as reporter Steve Martin – were added into the original footage. In both the Japanese and American versions of Godzilla, the story is basically the same: a 400ft amphibious monster, brought back to life by underwater nuclear testing, goes on a rampage in a tinker-toy Tokyo. The monster seems to have been forged from the memory of nuclear attacks on Japan during WWII, making it ironic that it became such a huge success across the pond. Though Godzilla is apparently destroyed in the film’s climax, this didn’t prevent Toho Studios from grinding out an endless series of sequels with the title character becoming less destructive and more lovable with each subsequent film.
Jaws (1975)
Based on Peter Benchley’s best-selling novel, Steven Spielberg’s 1975 shark saga set the standard for the New Hollywood popcorn blockbuster while frightening millions of moviegoers out of the water. When a woman is violently dragged down to the ocean depths after a late-night skinny dip, the seaside town Sherriff – played by Roy Schneider – becomes suspicious of a dangerous creature lurking beneath the waves. Once a few more beach-goers are graphically gobbled up by an enormous shark, confirming those suspicions, a team of hunters are sent to kill the beast and end it’s tirade on the town’s citizens, who remain desperate for a dip. Jaws feeds on the fear of the unknown. An inspired choice of music and the fact that Spielberg restrains from showing the creature, means viewers are kept on the edge of their seats as the carnage unfolds.
Alien (1979)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yfoUUaEt4Qw
In very much the same vein as Jaws, Ridley Scott’s sci-fi horror classic set its creature amidst the unknown; only instead of the big blue ocean, it was the bigger, darker outer space. This is a clear example of how monster movies evolved by borrowing characteristics from the horror genre, with the blood and gore noticeably turned up a notch from creature features before it. The plot of the film very much resembles a haunted house movie, except instead of a haunted house it’s a cargo spaceship with a crew of innocent space truckers, and instead of a ghost or mad-mad, it’s a vicious, flesh eating alien. With conception of the Xenomorph taking place in a human stomach after a face-hugging creature impregnates the host against its will, the film tackles some pretty dark subject matter. Whereas previous monsters such as King Kong and Frankenstein could engender a certain amount of sympathy from viewers, you’ll find no such luck with this double-mouthed extraterrestrial.
The Great Wall (2017)
Cinema’s latest venture into monster territory comes in the form of Zhang Yimou’s The Great Wall. Set well before any of the other titles on this list, in 11th Century China, warriors are summoned to the nation’s greatest landmark to defend their people against a horde of alien monsters who rise every sixty years. Matt Damon’s William and his partner in crime, Tovar (Pedro Pascal), arrive at the wall as mercenaries on the hunt for explosive ‘black powder’, but are quickly kidnapped by those living there (including Tian Jing as the sassy Commander Lin Mae) as they harbour a secret… William and Tovar end up being in the wrong place at the wrong time, and soon find themselves having to lend a hand in fighting off the monsters from atop the wall in a bid to end the suffering at the hands of these mysterious creatures. What sets these creatures apart from others on this list is not only the sheer volume of them, but their ability to telepathically connect with their Queen and operate as a unit – proving a formidable force for William and Commander Lin to contend with in their bid to defend their beloved Great Wall.
The Great Wall is available on Digital, 4K Ultra HD, 3D Blu-ray, Blu-ray, DVD and On Demand June 12, 2017 from Universal Pictures Home Entertainment and Legendary Pictures
